She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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