what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
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