check it out our google latitudes are spooning
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Randomize
