I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
