Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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