I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
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