i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize