do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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