I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize