he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
