White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Randomize
