New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Its about making memories worth repressing
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Randomize
