i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
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