I think I died a long time ago.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
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