I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
