Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
