Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
soo... how was my night?
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
