Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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