Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
