can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Randomize
