i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
In America we eat man semen.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Randomize
