Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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