If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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