To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
