So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
