They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize