ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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