Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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