I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
Randomize
