i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
