Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
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