That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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