I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
