Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
