I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
im on a boat
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