me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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