Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Randomize
