so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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