bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
