Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
is it fun? or sober?
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
