are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
