I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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