wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Oh god it's open bar.
Randomize
