you're like a bully in the Christmas story
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
