I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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