You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
