someone get that fucking seahorse.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
