I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
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