So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
