so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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